Didn't intentionally skip posting yesterday, but it was a busy day, and no dramatic improvement in either my course of action or my mood. I don't really remember what I ate, but I'm sure it wasn't good. I think I had an Egg McMuffin and hash brown for breakfast, coffee and oj. Lunch (at Joanna's) was some of her Mexican soup with cheese and sour cream. Dinner.... I think it was Wendy's? McDonalds? Not sure... Actually, it was leftover baked chicken, mashed potatoes (the instant kind), and a little of the wild rice/quinoa mix (and I do mean a little, like less than half a cup). So not too bad. Just not deliberately good. At least if I'm going to do something stupid like eat at McDonalds, I did it for breakfast. I did have sweet tea with dinner. Not too bad a day, all in all.
Then there's today. Four-egg omelet for breakfast, with cheese. Coffee, 2 cups, water. Lunch was a piece of string cheese, a brownie, and a very small piece of cheesecake at Joanna's. (I babysat today for her not because she was working, but because she had her wisdom teeth out). I also had most of a chicken breast (I shared some with Jenny and Aidynn) for an early dinner. THEN on the way home, because the chicken wasn't enough, I went to McDonalds. Again. Two cheeseburgers this time, fries, medium coke.
And I feel so crappy. Not because of eating. Just because I hate the thought of the rest of my life. It's such a dismal thought, I can't face it. In fact, I hate it. Sometimes, I just want to go to bed and sleep for the rest of my life. At least I wouldn't be eating.